AraC

It’s HAPPINESS?! -and I’m not high-

Was there ever any doubt I was the funny, sexy smart one?

Nope! And the last maybe 6 hours have been a lot of fun. Who needs real life friends when I have people in electronic boxes! I had a “you go first”, “no YOU go first” moment while trying to say good bye for the 3rd time.. I’ve been trying to say bye for an hour ahaha. So I said

“I have hours of work ahead of me. Haha thank you and good night =)”

I get back…

” ~ “

WHAT DOES THAT MEAN??!?

Me—— “A worm? You sent me a worm?!” “WTF”

“Sure lol”

I don’t even understand but I have laughed out loud more tonight then I can remember in the last month! I’m not even that concerned about my project worth 15% of my final mark that is due in the morning and I’m barely started…

My kidneys are acting up. Not sure if a cyst has burst or just a change in size which is putting more pressure on. The pain makes me want to cut my kidneys out with a steak knife. I’ve got an ice pack on my right one which is the hurting one. It helps but it’s still painful to move. I tried looking up stuff and treatment again today but I know there is no point. There is no cure, all I can do is wait. The doctors talk about how they can’t treat for chronic pain and patients such as myself just get used to it.

It’s so shitty that all I can do is get used to it. I can try ice massages, whirlpools and the like, or I can take up to a lot of asprin. Cory gave me one of his T3’s and an ibuprofen. He also went to get me/us Dairy Queen.

I feel pathetic being in so much pain it’s crippling me. I hope this passes soon.

mari-doyou-juana-deactivated201 asked: I just read your thing about your 'ex friend.' Sorry to hear about that. I know how that is. A lot of people do. It's hard. But for someone to leave you like that in the dust? They're not worth it at all. He missed out on a great friend! His loss.

colormesmall asked: Hey I found some of your posts when I searched kidneys.. I've been getting pain a lot recently and I don't know why. Its usually in the two sides of my back where I think my kidneys are. Sometimes it makes my back lock up and I can't move. Its normally quite a dull pain and doesn't follow a pattern. I was wondering if this is anything like you have experienced? I've asked my doctor and nurse before but they haven't a clue!!

Hi there,

I can’t say I’ve had my back lock up on me, but it is a constant pain without a real pattern. There can be extreme pain when a cyst bursts and leaves your body (this is much worse for men.) A doctor should know more about kidneys, and if it is in that area they might recommend an ultrasound. It could be just an infection which anibiotics will clear right up.

Hope you get some answers!

.http://www.youtube.com/watch?NR=1&v=ePj2GFS65RM&feature=endscreen

I’m having a moment, thinking about an “ex friend” Kieran. Who “broke up” with me this summer. In a major time of need in my life. I was going though the worst experience of my life and it was too taxing on him. He also got a girlfriend who didn’t trust us together. I guess I can’t really blame her, but we really were just friends. We never kissed or anything.Kieran was tall, handsome, super intelligent and weird we got along really well. I really liked him. I miss his friendship. He claimed we never had it, but that is a horrible outrageous lie that I think he said to reassure himself that leaving me was the right thing.  It nearly broke my heart. We had so many good times together, and memories that can’t be a lie! We used to listen to RHCP when ever we were together. Now it’s hard for me to listen to them without thinking of him and crying. I don’t share RHCP with anyone else. Kieran is engaged to the girlfriend that I think hinted he ditch me. The wedding is in a few months. He hasn’t even known her a year I don’t think. She makes him into something different. Not the Kieran I know and like, so I guess it’s good we have no contact. But to deny we were friends at all hurts a lot.

We went on a walk on day though a park in February and took photos with our fancy professional cameras. He never uploaded all the ones he took because there were too many of me and he didn’t want people to get the wrong idea about us on facebook. This hurt for one because I had a crush on him and for two that our friendship had to be secret.

We also had a moment we were driving in his truck, off road to do some photography and we went around a corner and I fell over into his lap, and it was a beautiful moment, RHCP was playing on tape and we are laughing and then he says, he would have kissed me right then, if I had been Isabelle. The girl he liked at the time. It hurt being told like that, if I was someone else he would feel romanticlly towards me.

When he looked at me like this, how could I not fall for him?

I miss him. </3

Maybe for the first time ever, this day will mean something. But really it’s just a day.